A new beginning

Along with several colleagues, I was among the first thousand people to register for the inaugural Brighton marathon, happening next April 18 (exactly a week after my birthday). It's time to do some exercise again!

I haven't cycled to work in months and the running has been very patchy. I went for a run this morning (by the way, christ it's hot) and going past the plate glass frontage of the local off licence (where we have been a bit too regularly lately!) was an unneeded and unnecessarily cruel reminder of why the only mirror I look in at home is the one that's only just big enough to shave in. My face, I mean. Even I'm not THAT gay.

Anyway, it is a bit early to start training for the marathin in earnest. What I really need to try and do in the short term is try to get some kind of physical activity built in as a regular part of my week. Cycling, running, whatever. Knowing me, I probably will launch into the marathon training programme fairly soon and just do it multiple times.

I have recorded previous training programmes for London in as amusing a way as possible in the past, and will be doing the same here again. Read the back-catalogue if you have some spare time - if you're a first-timer who's registered for Brighton there could be some useful tips and if you're struggling, at least you'll know you're not alone!

Looking forward to hill runs and those dreaded fartleks - guaranteed to turn my face and, occasionally, the pavement 'all the colours of the speculum', as Victoria Wood once said. Bring it on!

At least (apart from a little bit around Brighton marina, which I've tackled before in the Sussex beacon Half Marathon) the course is almost completely flat. I'm therefore heading down towards the seafront for training runs now and missing the hills out unless the training programme acutally specifies a hill session. It's fairly flat to the South of us, not completely flat, obviously, or we'd have to be airlifted to safety every time the tide came in. People of South Portslade, Shoreham, Lancing, Worthing, Hove and Brighton be prepared for a regular display of moobs and wobble-bot over the next few months. I PROMISE ALWAYS TO WEAR A TOP!!! I hope you will do me the same courtesy. You know who you are.

And another one

Grey and miserable this morning, but not too windy and not actually raining. 'Why not?', I thought. I couldn't think of a good reason, so off I trolled.

I seem to be having horrible problems with my quads since I started again. (The chafing, you'll be pleased to hear, has gone.) I used to suffer a bit on downhill sections, but at the moment, no matter how much I stretch or what warm up exercises I do, they feel really tight and sore, even on the flat. Hey ho, I'm sure it will wear off if I manage to keep it up.

iPod Genius went all acieed on me this morning, which helped keep the tempo up and which I feel entitled to blame for my current spots-before-the-eyes condition. Which, actually, I'm finding rather pleasant.

Coffee, shower, then BRING ON THE DAY.

Holy ****

Same route - until I get my book back, I lack the imagination to come up with a bynch of different courses, or the guts to attempt more than 30 minutes. I didn't wear my lycra underthings this morning, my reasoning being: it's thirty minutes, how much chafing could there be?

Without going into any detail. OH MY GOD A LOT.

Ouch

Nuff said.

Success

Managed to sleep right through to my alarm this morning and get out for a run. I repeated the reverse route from the other day (where there's a major shunt right at the end). It's the first time since I started beinng active again that I DIDN'T STOP FOR A WALK IN THE MIDDLE! Hurrah!!!. I got round what used to be my 30-minute medium-pace course in 30 minutes 26 seconds.

Now, that is about 10 seconds per mile slower than before, which sounds quite a lot. But it's actually on 1.67%, which is pretty darned good. Faithful iPod and its new Genius feature helped, picking a sequence of dance tunes with very similar BPM, including Mac Thornhill's 'Who's gonna ease the pressure'. Now this is a piece of very early house genius. Immensely long, but towards the end there's this sequence of what was then cutting edge sampling, which is an absolute pant wetter. It's not on Blip, but if anyone finds it on Last or Spottify, I might consider giving them a try.

Thinking of other people for a bit, my friend and colleague requires sponsorship for the Great North Run later this year. Mr David Hughes, more power to your elbow. Knee. Whatever.

And congratulations to Maddie Wood, who completed her first marathon, the Edinburgh, in ferocious heat and despite the fact that they ran out of water (echoes of Boston) last weekend. Please sponsor Maddie here.

Oh dear

Just reread my last post. Wasn't I all full of myself. Haven't been for another run since!!! I set my alarm for 6.30 every morning to give myself a chance to go out before work. But I keep waking up at 3, getting back to sleep eventually and hitting 'snooze' a lot. Maybe tomorrow, my work from home day, will be better.

I also clearly haven't been on Blip.fm (which is FAB and you must join) for a while. I'll rectify that immediately.

Until tomorrow. I hope.

2 days in a row

Woke up this morning feeling great. Sunshine. So I went for a run. Same course as yesterday, only reversed. That meant the shunt from yesterday became a nice, downhill breath-catcher. Of course, it also meant the nice downhill bits from yesterday became today's shunts, only more so, because one of them IS REALLY STEEP AND RIGHT AT THE END.

We live on a shunt, surrounded by shunts. Moving to Norfolk is obviously out of the question. I mean, come on. Amstedam's a possibility. Is there an Amsterdam marathon, I wonder? If there is, I bet it's a right laugh!!!

Morning run

The most gorgeous start to the day. I have to run some errands a lunch time, by when I hope to have stopped sweating. And we have a company barbecue this evening, so I won't be running then. So I went this morning before work.

My 30-minute route from when I was training regularly took me 32 minutes. It's roughly 3.6 miles. So not too bad. For me, anyway. I'm sure for the innocent bystanders it was quite as shocking as the last one. Not a lot of bystanders this morning, actually. And they were all either extremely old or extremely young. Did they finally make teenagers illegal? If so, Mr. Brown, all is forgiven, please claim your next replacement lightbulb on me! Anyway, back on topic.

I did stop and walk half way through, too. The route has this huge bloody great hill called Foredown something-or-other. I always have to much sweat in my eyes by that point to see if it's a Road or a Drive or whatever. And it's a complete...let's call it a shunt and you can slip a la freud as you see fit. I'm sure it's allowed, but I lent my book to my friend Madeleine Wood, who used it to train for the recent Edinburgh marathon. Maddy, can I have the book back? As I say, I know there are training sessions that permit walking, but you know me, I have to have EVERYTHING ini writing.

TTFN

Ooops

I was fully intending to go for a run this morning. But my other half woke me up this morning and it was HALF PAST ELEVEN.

We have had the most brilliant weekend at my cousin's house. And we did walk for miles and miles and miles, both at the Heathfield show on Saturday and walking the loony dog yesterday, so I'm not feeling all that guilty.

Pictures here:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=2629564&l=6802310725&id=530049972

Been for a run. Sort of.

First one for...ooo...months and months. And therefore, not surprisingly, hideous both for me and for anyone unfortunate enough to have seen me. Children crying, old people with zimmer frames and cataracts asking me to 'move along, please', pregnant mothers asking if I'm taking the piss running around with a pillow stuffed up my t-shirt and 'do you know how it really feels'. That sort of thing.

Was out for about 30 minutes and, with no batteries for my pedometer and therefore just estimating against how far I remember being able to get when I was in regular training, I'm about 15% worse than before.

But then, with the excess I'm lugging around lately, as Patsy Stone once said, 'It is a miracle that I can walk at all.' She also said, 'Smoking is good for you.' Ab Fab was brilliant, wasn't it. All sort of like the bible. Which bits do you just believe and which require a value judgement?

It nearly worked

Only, I managed to sleep right through the night last night. I have the scary lycra on now, though, and plan to 'run' at lunchtime.

I have a cunning plan

I'm making a concerted effort these days to go to bed at a decent hour. 4 months or so off the ciggies and my sleeping patterns have returned to normal. That means six or seven hours' sleep a night. But I'm so focussed on the getting up that I keep failing to realise that 9.30 or 10 o'clock is TOO early to turn in. I keep waking up and just lying there, tossing and turning.

So tonight I will put a set of running gear in the living room. That way, I can get up and go for a run without clattering around in the dark looking for stuff and waking my other half up! Whether or not I actually do, of course, remains to be seen.

But I can actually feel jigglage when I walk and it's been over twenty years since I had that. Time to do something about it, and the lighter mornings will help.

Fingers crossed.

Yeah, and?

Wanna make something of it?

Not running, but moving

I still haven't got back into the running thing, but hope to start this weekend. As long as it's not snowing.

I am doing daily Wii Fit now, though. And I had my bike fixed at long last, so have cycle commuted yesterday and today. If the pounds don't start dropping off my waist and adding themselves to my shoulders, I'll be most upset.

Fitpiggy filling up

Still not been for a run, but did a Wii Fit session at lunchtime yesterday and am opening up more and more exercises. Yoga's fun and really making me aware of my appalling posture. Muscle exercises are highlighting the fact that I have no muscles.

I also had my bike collected yesterday and hope to get it back today so I can start cycle commuting again.

Physical activity has occurred

It's not massive progress and certainly not enough to get me on the way to the half marathon in February. (I still haven't actually had confirmation I have a place, mind, just that they've accpeted my entry fee. Anyone else?)

But I did 30 mins on the Wii Fit yesterday, doing every available exercise once. Now, of course, I've opened up some more. Sigh. And, also, ow. My calves are killing me. Also my back. And, oh, my stomach. That'll be the lunges, press ups and jackknifes, then.

Am working from home for the next couple of days, so should be able to squeeze in sessions before I start and am also hoping to get my bike fixed by this lot, who are apparently fabulous.

Off the buses. Expect to hear whinge about by glutes in the near future.

Colds ain't what they used to be

This one's lasted 2 weeks so far. But I feel the end is in sight. I can breathe and taste my food again at last, but still cough every time I laugh, which is really annoying cos I laugh ALL THE TIME. Am hoping to run tomorrow. It was going to be today, but there was brandy last night and I've got ridiculous amounts of work to do this weekend which I'm focusing on today. I think I'll try the 'long run' from whichever week in the programme I'm meant to be in in order to be ready for a half marathon in February. Just working that out could take a while, but onwards and upwards and I'll let you know how it goes if and when it happens.

I think you'll find it's double pneumonia

I've had a head full of yuck all week, aches and pains, etc. I haven't done any exercise at all and don't plan any today. Clearly, this can't be a simple cold. I am a man, after all. (Please feel free not to comment.) If I make it through the weekend without enduring a slow and painful death, I shall expect to be treated as a total hero and then I'll get back into the health thing.

Medical dictionaries are tremendous fun, aren't they? I believe I have some or all of the following:

Pneumonia
Tuberculosis
Ebola
Dengue Fever
West Nile Virus

I am therefore already a medical miracle and an absolute marvel. Go me!!!!!!

Why do men have nipples?

So, I've finally restarted my physical activity. Set up the Wii Fit this morning and did a 20-minute session as a warm up. Actually, I did a 20-minute session and then had a ciggie, but what the hey.

Starting again with Sam Murphy's book 'Marathon from start to finish' as I'm aiming for the Brighton half marathon in February. 20 minute 'steady run' today, which wasn't as difficult as I thought it might be given my sedentary lifestyle since the London Marathon in April this year. I covered 2.24 miles. But my nipples are killing me, despite the low-friction running gear. Why, god, why? I know they're quite fun when they get the right sort of attention, but that hasn't happened this millennium and doesn't seem likely again....ever.

Depending on the pain level in my lallies, I'll try to get out again tomorrow. Anyone in Brighton know a good and cheap bike mechanic? I need some low-impact exercise while I train to try to protect these Friday-night-special knees of mine.

Excuse the overuse of the old hyphen. I'm finally starting to forget all the useless crap I learned at school. At least I didn't capitalise randomly like I do at work. Sometimes it's as if I were German!

Fitness planning ahoy

Just returned from 2 weeks in Spain, staying at my parents' house in the hills in Almeria province, near the towns of Mojacar and Vera. It was utterly bona. a couple of really thundery days, which nobody minded as it turned the surrounding 'desert' environment a truly amazing shade of green as dormant plant life took advantage of the unusual weather. It also gave us an opportunity to spend time indoors playing ridiculous games and laughing a hell of a lot. Including doing Yoga and Aerobics on my prents' new Wii Fit, a birthday present to go with the Wii console we all clubbed together to get them for their ruby wedding anniversary.

Well, I'm inspired. It's real exercise, but indoors. So I bought myself one, too and will be using it regularly, as well as now committing to getting back into the whole running thing. I also need to get my bike fixed so I can start cycling to work every day again.

And the rest of the holiday was just great. Fresh, healthy mediterranean cuisine. Lolling about on the beach getting my lallies all bronzed and vardaing the dolly little pollones and great butch omies (of which there is a gratifying plethora) mincing up and down the sabled plage.

Back on pudding island (but with some surprising and most welcome sunshine), 8 weeks in the office and then off we all troll back to Spain for Christmas and new year.

Fantabulosa!!!